The marital home is often the most contentious element of a divorce. It’s often the most valuable. The couple invested in it and made it into their home. Who gets it? More importantly, who should move out while the divorce proceeding isn’t finalized yet?
Whether you live in another county or in Suffolk County, a divorce attorney will advise you to stay in the marital home until the divorce is handed down by the court. There can be a lot of legal implications if one of you leaves the marital home. Unless there is a reason for one party to believe that their safety is compromised with their partner in the same house, lawyers will often convince couples to stay together in one house until after the divorce is finalized.
If you are a battered and abused partner, you may ask the court to issue a protective order asking your spouse to move out of the house. If your spouse doesn’t want to cooperate, you can be the one to move one, taking your kids with you. But remember to obtain a court order for the temporary custody of your kids. You can be accused of kidnapping them by taking them out of the house.
Be the Better Person
If there is no abuse to consider and you just can’t stay together anymore, consider being the better partner and leave the marital home. Let your partner live in peace. That’s the least you can do for someone you deeply cared about before. Just make sure that you can still visit your kids or the kids can visit you wherever you may be staying.
But remember that your temporary accommodation should be safe for children and near the marital home. If you transfer to another city or state during the divorce, the judge may think that you are abandoning your kids. If you choose to live in an unsafe neighborhood, you might have a hard time getting shared custody of the kids. The judge will consider the safety of the neighborhood before granting the custody of the kids. The judge also wouldn’t want your kids to stay in a one-bedroom apartment or in the basement of your parents’ house.
Make a Mutual Decision to Move Out
How about both of you move out of the marital home? You can sell the house and split the money. It’s a win-win situation for both of you. Staying in the home where you built your dreams and family may not be healthy for you and the kids. Consider moving the kids out of the home where there are too many good and bad memories.
This might be better for them emotionally and psychologically. It will help you move on to your new life, too. Living in the same house will become a constant reminder that your marriage failed. This will cause undue stress both to the spouse who will be left there and the children.
Divorce is always such a hard thing for both parties, especially for the kids. Work together to maintain a semblance of friendship at least until after the divorce is finalized. Finally, don’t be afraid to seek counseling. Divorce proceedings will take its toll on you. It’s important to have professional help to get you through the rough times.